Essential Techniques for Couple’s Counseling

Couple’s counseling is hugely popular in the United States. It’s so popular, in fact, that about 30% of couples in the United States have received some form of couple's counseling at some point in their relationship. Counseling is especially popular among folx who are on the verge of divorce, with one-third of divorced couple’s reporting they’ve attended counseling.

Couple’s counseling in America is not only popular, but effective! According to a survey conducted by the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy, about 98% of couples who received couples therapy reported that they received good or excellent services, and 97% of those surveyed said they got the help they needed.  Additionally, a meta-analysis of 75 studies on couple's therapy found that on average, couples who received therapy showed significant improvement in relationship satisfaction, communication, and reduced conflict. The study also found that these effects were maintained over time, with couples reporting improvements up to two years after therapy.

Overall, research suggests that couple's counseling can be an effective way to improve relationship satisfaction, communication, and reduce conflict. What makes couple’s counseling so effective? Join the pros at Therapy Practice Solutions as we talk about essential skills for any couple’s counseling modality!

“I” Statements

"I statements" are a powerful communication tool often used in therapy to express one's feelings, thoughts, and needs in a clear and respectful way. When using "I statements," individuals take responsibility for their own feelings rather than blaming or criticizing others. For example, instead of saying "you always make me feel angry," an individual might say "I feel angry when this happens." This approach can improve communication and reduce conflict in relationships. 

“I statements” can look like …

  • I feel undervalued when I do the brunt of the chores.

  • I feel overwhelmed when I take the kids to school, sports, and the doctors alone.

  • I feel upset when I feel unheard.

Active Listening

Active listening is a fundamental skill in couples counseling that helps partners feel heard and understood. Active listening involves giving full attention to the speaker and clarifying their message by reflecting back what they have said. This can be done by paraphrasing or summarizing what the speaker has said and checking for understanding. Active listening can also involve nonverbal communication, such as making eye contact and nodding to show engagement and interest. Research has shown that active listening can improve communication and reduce conflicts in relationships. 

Setting Shared Goals

Creating shared goals is an essential aspect of couple's counseling that can help partners work towards a common vision and strengthen their relationship. Shared goals involve identifying and prioritizing shared values and aspirations, and creating a plan for achieving them together. Setting shared goals can also promote a sense of collaboration, trust, and accountability in the relationship. According to the American Psychological Association, setting shared goals can help couples develop a sense of purpose and meaning in their relationship, and can provide a sense of direction and motivation to work towards their shared vision. Additionally, research has shown that couples who set shared goals are more likely to experience positive outcomes in their relationship, such as improved communication, increased intimacy, and reduced conflict. 

We hope this blog post helped share a little bit about what makes an effective couple’s counselor - the ability to model and teach “I statements”, active listening, and facilitated shared goals. If you’re looking for a teammate yourself, look no further than Therapy Practice Solutions! Reach out today to be paired with someone who can take your administrative tasks, marketing, social media creation, and more off your hands! We look forward to hearing from you.


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